The word on the street

I had the misfortune to have to venture down Oxford Street the other day, a street which was a tourist attactions in it's own right, a shopping shangri-la when I wasn't a Londoner. Has it changed or has my migration to the capital changed my view?

These days you have to run the gauntlet of language school pimps, clearance shops and buses that take longer to traverse Marble Arch to Tottenham Court Road than an asthmatic ant with heavy bags. I say 'run the gauntlet' but of course that in itself would be unwise with the uneven pavements, meandering visitors and advertising obstacles.

Having just returned from Paris my temporary lack of patriotism is only because I've got London's best interests at heart! The Champs Elysees is wide, clean and tree-lined. Oxford Street is narrow, dirty with the occasional bench. But who in their right mind would want to sit down unless they were already about to die from the diesel fumes?

I'm sure most Londoners try and avoid the place too unless their life depended on it (John Lewis and Selfridges for example). The Oxford Street Association often mentions the odd nip, the occasional tuck there. It doesn't need cosmetic surgery, it needs resucitation. Some radical schemes have been proposed including a tram or monorail: don't discuss it in a committee, do it and pedestrianise the rest before everyone emigrates to Bluewater and leaves London's main shopping artery for dead.